Let me tell you a little story about how I got the conclusion that perspective is everything and it can be achieved by asking yourself questions when you see you have “wild” thoughts. As many people, I have frustrations and as many people I was not paying attention to them, that sh*t can’t harm us too much, right?
No, it’s wrong. While some frustrations can make us stronger, some makes us weak. When we’re weak, we can be very easy influenced especially by the things related to those frustrations. A few months ago I was killed by that combination. Because of that, I did some crazy things despite my true beliefs. The frustration voices in my head got so loud and I believed them, while my true inner voice was silent. Was it too shocked to react?
From time to time, that silent voice did said something like “WTF ARE YOU DOIN’?”, but I didn’t listen to it. The feeling that somehow my frustrations are satisfied was strong, too strong and my morality was down. Until a certain point where that silent voice decided to play the same game and some automatic thoughts about the outcome of my actions came. I realized I was having a problem. That was the moment I decided I needed to do something to fix my head and the first thing I did was to start this blog. Writing helped me throw out all the voices in my head while spreading everything on “paper”. I started to question everything and since I don’t have all the answers, I’ve started to search them outside… in psychology books and youtube videos and the more I learn, the more interesting everything gets and I’m trying to share as many useful things I can in an interesting way.
While is normal to have frustrations, it should also be normal to fix them somehow. Maybe the outcome is not the one expected, but the trying can make things better and when we start surrounding ourselves with “perspective”, we might get to the point of interiorizing it.
I don’t know if what I just said makes sense, but my conclusion is this: frustrations need to be acknowledged because almost every person has them and after acknowledging and naming them, we have to start working on them because we can get f*cked in so many ways we cannot even imagine. As I say with each occasion I have: our thoughts influences our emotions and our behavior without us realizing this, but if we question the thoughts we have, we might get in control of our minds.
What do you do to “fix” your frustrations?
Well firstly good job processing the thoughts and second it’s great to challenge our thoughts and become stronger with actions to soothe the mind
I am not afraid of not knowing everything because my personality trait is fear of illness or seriously bad stuff happening
I am really an admirer of self advocacy and the words of our inner selves are stronger than we think but support is crucial for stepping forward
The importance is to become a whole person one step at a time
I agree. It’s like building a palace one brick at a time.
So true and the beauty is you sculpture the tower that is your light house when you are finished
I really can relate to this. A few years ago, I started keeping a journal to let my emotions out. I figured the paper wouldn’t judge me and I could keep track of my thoughts (some of which were not always pretty). After reading them, I would see a lot about myself that needed improving, embracing, or more of my attention. So reading your post reminded me that getting those thoughts and emotions out, so that we can see them, helps us in managing them. I really admire the honesty that you put in your posts. They’re always encouraging! 🙂
I’m glad you like them! And yes, keeping track of our thoughts can be very helpful in many ways.
I would say, don’t be so afraid to judge things. Think about it, if you review something in your diary and ask ‘is this particular thing helping me in life?’, isn’t that judgment? 🙂
Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me! That is very true! 🙂
For me, one of the better things to do is see them as part of yourself.
With obsessive thoughts (because that’s generally what they are, or become – in my experience at least), it’s very important not to react to them. This is why people with OCD struggle with situations; they have an incorrect perspective on the situation, and react in a way that doesn’t help. Of course, not their fault.
So one thing is to let them be. This may seem hard, if we really think these things are ‘bad’, but nothing in the mind is real until it is allowed to be. Letting a thought be, does not do this. It will come. It will go. It’s only when we hold on, does it take us for that ride.
If we do this, our perspective can change. We realise that, things really weren’t what we thought they were, and that really helps lift you out of the situation. This is all based on my own experiences.
Have you ever looked at lucid dreaming?
Yes, seeing those thoughts and questioning their validity can bring perspective change. I’ve heard about that and I remember that at some point I found some “strategy” to get to have lucid dreams, but I haven’t looked deeper into that.
I would wholly recommend it; I have read that studies have shown that, people who practice something in a lucid dream, actually improve their skills in waking life.
If you can bring up things that bother you, for example, in the dream world – you can learn more about them. The mind will give you answers in a way not usually obtained in normal reality. You can also have fun 🙂
Thank you for this! I’ll look into it 🙂
I walk in the woods. I let all frustrating ideas come out. Today I feel I’m too weak to walk. Shall I be overwhelmed¿ who knows
It sounds like a good strategy. If you feel overwhelmed, you can try writing about whatever comes through your head. It might help 🙂
It helps. I have tons of copybooks full of thoughts. I’ll try later . thanks
My pleasure!
Write!
Yeah, it’s one of the best.
So true!
Nice post.
Thank you! 😀
So true. It’s difficult, but I try to let go of the aspects that are out of my control, and remove fear of the outcome from the equation. I work to improve the areas I can, but I try to accept that whatever happens will happen, and I’ll be able to deal with it. It’s not easy!
Yes, I totally agree. It’s not easy, but in my opinion, it is necessarily.
When I was younger, I stopped myself every time I insulted myself, and changed the insult to something harmless and affectionate. Next, I had to learn to forgive myself. Now, I meditate.
And I’ve always written my way through my frustrations; it always helps me to be able to see my thoughts, and I always come to a conclusion that I couldn’t have foreseen without having seen it in writing.
Sometimes going for a long run or drive helps me sort out my brain; in a way, these things are meditation too. They force you to be quiet and live in the moment.
That is a great strategy you applied. I think it’s something magic about writing that gives it a huge power. 🙂
I myself…I’m sensitive and emotional. I call myself an Empath now, lol. I feel everything! I can’t focus on one thing. When I’m frustrated, it’s best that I not do or say anything rash or rushed. My benefit is that I KNOW when I’m feeling this way and I KNOW that I can’t do or say anything because I’m not in the right mindset (like an argument with a friend/boyfriend). So I’ll write or I just go somewhere to be alone so I can try to calm myself. I think I’m getting better at it, but still needs work.
I believe that all our life is a work in progress 🙂
I believe that too 🙂
I absolutely agree with you. I can relate. Although I am new to the blogging world, (it was just my sister’s idea) I had been writing almost all my life. Writing helps me a lot as well 😊.
Yes, exactly! Writing is magic! 😀
Love this!
I love that you love it! 😀
Spread love! hahahaha