I listened to this podcast today where Tom Bilyeu talked with Ed Mylett about some interesting ideas. One of the things that hit me hard was the story about the time Ed Mylett went to the doctor. He said that this doctor had a different approach in addressing the health issues Ed had. Instead of prescribing some meds and getting to the next patient, this doctor asked Ed if he has kids. When the doctor heard the affirmative response, he asked Ed if he wants to be there when his son graduates or when his daughter will get married. The answer was yes, obviously. Then the doctor said that if Ed wanted to be there, he needs to do exactly as prescribed, otherwise some strangers will be there instead of him. This was a huge emotional impact over Ed and something switched in his head. Now, whenever he doesn’t feel like going to the gym, he remembers that he needs to go so he can be there as his daughter’s wedding.
What I took from this is that whenever we feel tired of something or we don’t want to do things, we should try to find motivation in the people around us. For example, you say you cannot stop your alcohol addiction? Think about your children or your spouse or your parents. Do you want to be there when huge events happen in their lives? Do you want to make them happy or you want to make them suffer? Do you want to hurt the people you love the most? I assume you do not want that so if you stop drinking, you’ll be there for them a longer time. You can become the strong shoulder all of them can rely on. You can protect them and make them safe as long as you’re there.
I think this strategy is somehow related to what Mel Robbins is doing to overcome her fear of flight (in short, she thinks about something nice). The technique used is the anchor thought. Basically, an anchor thought is a powerful thought we can use to overcome hard times. When we don’t feel like doing something, or we feel some sort of fear, we can break that pattern with Mel’s 5 second rule and after that we can insert the anchor thought.
I found this technique very useful especially when I have no idea what the next blog post should be about. I feel some sort of anxiety because this automatic thought comes in (“I don’t know what to write about”) and I want to skip a day. I don’t always use the 5 second rule to break the negative pattern, but I do insert one of my anchor thought and then I feel how the anxiety disappears.
How do you make yourself do the things you don’t feel like doing?