Time and knowledge are the ones that stand between me and my goals. I need to organize my day more efficient so I can get more things done. I also have a daily “learning schedule” which helps me with the knowledge part.
Because on Sunday, her husband told me to get out and yesterday her son said, “I liked it better when it was just the 3 of us.” I don’t feel appreciated for all I do here.
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That’s just rude. Do you have any friends around where you could stay until you get your money in?
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No, I moved here in March from another State and haven’t made any friends that I feel close enough to ask.
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The only thing that stands between you and your goals is YOU.
If this is the case, I believe the goal for now could be to know yourself better. Maybe you can get to some level of clarity and you’ll be able to find the real goals.
Ingrained beliefs. That’s it. I personally think the most important and rewarding work anyone can do is to tear down their ingrained beliefs and examine them. Takes time though.
It takes lots of time because it’s easy to follow them since they already have a well established neuronal path. It takes work to create an alternative path so the existing one won’t be used anymore which in time will disappear.
From experience, though, beliefs and habits can be changed a lot faster than the experts say. It’s just a case of identifying them and then figuring out the best way to combat them.
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I agree with that, but there is a human element involved and this can be a problem because we sometimes don’t feel like doing what we need to do so we procrastinate a little (or more). It depends of how determined that particular person is to change.
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Absolutely…determination is the key. Looking back at my last comment, I realise it was a little argumentative…sorry about that, it’s early morning here and I hadn’t had my caffeine fix ☺️
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No worries! You can be as natural as you can here. 🙂
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Doubt, low self-esteem and social anxiety are the top three reasons
My blog for example. I send the links to particular people I feel need to know about a certain post. I feel like I need their approval and affirmation for my post to be considered “successful.” Or my photography dream. Even having the approval to sell in the gallery, I asked my kids to help me title some of the photographs. Not because I couldn’t, but I felt selfish not involving them. Like I was taking “something” away from them. Mind you, I didn’t say it made sense lol.
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It seems like you feel the need of other’s approval for what you’re doing. This is probably linked more to self-confidence. I guess that the part with asking your kids to help you with some titles it’s probably because you care about them so much that you want them to be part of the other passions you have. Does this makes any sense?
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Yes it does.
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Identity confusion, so that everyday I have different goals depending on which part of me is most dominant.
Identity confusion is something a greater majority of emerging adults go through between 18-25. This is a period of emotional fluctations, ‘depression’, and simply said a ‘quarter life crisis’. It’s perfectly normal to go through this period and for some people, it lasts longer than for others. (Jean Arnett called this period ’emerging adulthood’)
The best thing to do that really helps me is to always stay curious and maintain an open mind to everything that is to come 🙂
Time, plus I really don’t have any “goals”… I get up in the morning, think of something appropriate, make sure I am right and I do it, for my goal is to live life… 🙂
“No road is too long for him who advances slowly and does not hurry, and no attainment is beyond his reach who equips himself with patience to achieve it.” Jean de La Bruyere
For some people perhaps their goals are not their own, but something that they THINK they want, based on what others have told them or what society deems success to be. I’ve done a couple of posts about this, one about setting goals and another about the fear of failure.
For me it’s just time. I have a clear idea of what I’m working towards and how I’m going to get there. All that stands between then and now is time, and a lot of hard work!
As you say, for some people it really is that they THINK they want this and that goal. I also believe a major part is fear of setting oneself that goal because they are afraid that it might not be the right goal to set one week down the line.
Yes, I totally agree with you! It is so important to start knowing ourselves so we can learn how to differentiate between our own wishes and the ones we take from others.
Sometimes people get in the way of my goals, especially at work – this may be because it threatens them or they dislike change. So it means that it may take longer to achieve my goals, I need to revise the plan on how to get there. This can be useful in giving me the chance to gain a clearer definition of what my goals are and can sometimes lead to greater gains in other areas.
I could say..myself…my accent….my doubts…my insecurities..my routine….etc…but in reality what always stands between us and our goals is lack of money…. 😉
A lack of money is an obstacle. But in reality, it is so much more sometimes. A lack of contacts, lacking the technology, the time blah blah blah. The excuses are endless.
A great way that helped to really get resources is to actually stop focusing on wanting the resources but instead developing a resourceful mind. A resourceful mind consists of skills like creativity, social intelligence, a solid work ethic, seeing the glass half full instead of half empty (train for postivity) etc.
May sound a little cheesy, but I’ve personally really found this strategy to really help me 🙂
I doubt myself when it comes to personal projects getting completed. I feel quite confident when working to help others though.🙂
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This is interesting. Why do you think you feel confident when it comes to helping others, but not so much when it comes to your projects?
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Well, I deal with others on a daily basis to assist in encouraging toward the positive side of things, so I guess experience here. Not so with various life projects. I feel I lack the experience which leads to having confidence. Any ideas to offer for enlightenment?
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Maybe you could try treating yourself the way you treat them? Looking at the positive side of things of those projects from time to time.
Time and knowledge are the ones that stand between me and my goals. I need to organize my day more efficient so I can get more things done. I also have a daily “learning schedule” which helps me with the knowledge part.
Right now, money. I want to move out of my sister’s house immediately. However, my income tax return will come in March.
That’s a f*cked up situation. What is the main reason you want to move out?
Because on Sunday, her husband told me to get out and yesterday her son said, “I liked it better when it was just the 3 of us.” I don’t feel appreciated for all I do here.
That’s just rude. Do you have any friends around where you could stay until you get your money in?
No, I moved here in March from another State and haven’t made any friends that I feel close enough to ask.
The only thing that stands between you and your goals is YOU.
I love this! Once we start removing all the layers, we’ll get to the main cause which is ourselves.
You are spot on. Every damn barrier exists in our mind.
Fear. The fear of failure and the uncertainty of it all.
What is the worst thing that could happen?
I stand between me & my goals along with my erratic change in goals, immense confusion & self-doubt.
If this is the case, I believe the goal for now could be to know yourself better. Maybe you can get to some level of clarity and you’ll be able to find the real goals.
Ingrained beliefs. That’s it. I personally think the most important and rewarding work anyone can do is to tear down their ingrained beliefs and examine them. Takes time though.
It takes lots of time because it’s easy to follow them since they already have a well established neuronal path. It takes work to create an alternative path so the existing one won’t be used anymore which in time will disappear.
From experience, though, beliefs and habits can be changed a lot faster than the experts say. It’s just a case of identifying them and then figuring out the best way to combat them.
I agree with that, but there is a human element involved and this can be a problem because we sometimes don’t feel like doing what we need to do so we procrastinate a little (or more). It depends of how determined that particular person is to change.
Absolutely…determination is the key. Looking back at my last comment, I realise it was a little argumentative…sorry about that, it’s early morning here and I hadn’t had my caffeine fix ☺️
No worries! You can be as natural as you can here. 🙂
Doubt, low self-esteem and social anxiety are the top three reasons
I think that building up the self esteem can help with the other two. What can help with rising the self esteem level?
No idea 😐 been wondering that for like 15 years…
Your excuses…
Yes, we keep ourselves down most of the time.
Somehow the feeling that my goals have to include everyone. That my dreams and goals do not belong solely to me.
Interesting. Can you give an example?
My blog for example. I send the links to particular people I feel need to know about a certain post. I feel like I need their approval and affirmation for my post to be considered “successful.” Or my photography dream. Even having the approval to sell in the gallery, I asked my kids to help me title some of the photographs. Not because I couldn’t, but I felt selfish not involving them. Like I was taking “something” away from them. Mind you, I didn’t say it made sense lol.
It seems like you feel the need of other’s approval for what you’re doing. This is probably linked more to self-confidence. I guess that the part with asking your kids to help you with some titles it’s probably because you care about them so much that you want them to be part of the other passions you have. Does this makes any sense?
Yes it does.
Identity confusion, so that everyday I have different goals depending on which part of me is most dominant.
Can really relate to that sometimes!
Identity confusion is something a greater majority of emerging adults go through between 18-25. This is a period of emotional fluctations, ‘depression’, and simply said a ‘quarter life crisis’. It’s perfectly normal to go through this period and for some people, it lasts longer than for others. (Jean Arnett called this period ’emerging adulthood’)
The best thing to do that really helps me is to always stay curious and maintain an open mind to everything that is to come 🙂
Do you have a certain part of you that is dominant most of the time?
Time, plus I really don’t have any “goals”… I get up in the morning, think of something appropriate, make sure I am right and I do it, for my goal is to live life… 🙂
“No road is too long for him who advances slowly and does not hurry, and no attainment is beyond his reach who equips himself with patience to achieve it.” Jean de La Bruyere
That’s great!
“Forever is composed of nows.” Emily Dickinson
For some people perhaps their goals are not their own, but something that they THINK they want, based on what others have told them or what society deems success to be. I’ve done a couple of posts about this, one about setting goals and another about the fear of failure.
For me it’s just time. I have a clear idea of what I’m working towards and how I’m going to get there. All that stands between then and now is time, and a lot of hard work!
As you say, for some people it really is that they THINK they want this and that goal. I also believe a major part is fear of setting oneself that goal because they are afraid that it might not be the right goal to set one week down the line.
Yes, I totally agree with you! It is so important to start knowing ourselves so we can learn how to differentiate between our own wishes and the ones we take from others.
Sometimes people get in the way of my goals, especially at work – this may be because it threatens them or they dislike change. So it means that it may take longer to achieve my goals, I need to revise the plan on how to get there. This can be useful in giving me the chance to gain a clearer definition of what my goals are and can sometimes lead to greater gains in other areas.
If the environment you’re in right now is not helpful with your goals, maybe is time to do something to change it?
Good point 🙂
Fear, although I continue pursuing my career goals in spite of this. Nice blog!
Keep it up! 🙂
Thank you! Well, that is the definition of courage. If you can move forward even though fear tries to kick your ass, you’re tough!
My mind.
At the end of the day, I believe that our own minds are our biggest blockers.
I could say..myself…my accent….my doubts…my insecurities..my routine….etc…but in reality what always stands between us and our goals is lack of money…. 😉
A lack of money is an obstacle. But in reality, it is so much more sometimes. A lack of contacts, lacking the technology, the time blah blah blah. The excuses are endless.
A great way that helped to really get resources is to actually stop focusing on wanting the resources but instead developing a resourceful mind. A resourceful mind consists of skills like creativity, social intelligence, a solid work ethic, seeing the glass half full instead of half empty (train for postivity) etc.
May sound a little cheesy, but I’ve personally really found this strategy to really help me 🙂
Thanks for sharing! Keep it up! 🙂
Yes, the lack of money is a part of that, but the other part is ourselves which I believe it is more important.
Time.
The thing with time is that we cannot do anything about it. We can only do something with it.
Nothing now
That’s amazing! Your journey of finding yourself had a great positive impact on you! I’m so happy you managed to pull it through!
I learn every day and I always will
Its gotta be doubting myself.
In which areas do you doubt yourself and in which areas you don’t?
I doubt myself when it comes to personal projects getting completed. I feel quite confident when working to help others though.🙂
This is interesting. Why do you think you feel confident when it comes to helping others, but not so much when it comes to your projects?
Well, I deal with others on a daily basis to assist in encouraging toward the positive side of things, so I guess experience here. Not so with various life projects. I feel I lack the experience which leads to having confidence. Any ideas to offer for enlightenment?
Maybe you could try treating yourself the way you treat them? Looking at the positive side of things of those projects from time to time.
🙂👍🏾yes yes
Me
We can be our biggest enemies and/or our biggest friends.
That is absolutely true. I seem to fluctuate wildly between the two. But friendly me is much sweeter than enemy me. She’s a piece of work, lol