We’ve all read countless articles on many well-known websites, blogs, and guru-platforms that we shall NEVER compare ourselves to other people. In fact, we’re told to only compare ourselves to the person whom we were ‘yesterday’.
The problem is that looking back to ‘who you were yesterday’ actually inhibits your development more than improving it.
Research has confirmed that for the most part, we tend to overestimate our own improvement in life. (even if there is none, really). Looking back might create a sense of self-entitlement because we ‘feel’ like we’ve improved, even though this isn’t always the case.
This way of thinking, that we continously improve ourselves if we look back into the past, may make us feel good about ourselves, but will equally blind us from identifying our current development needs.
So, comparing yourself to ‘who you were yesterday’ may not be the way to go.
By contrast, looking ahead to who you want to become may serve you better.
You see, if we expect improvement in the future, we can transform those expectations into actionable goals. We can pursue these goals now. Furthermore, research shows our future selves can motivate us to be proactive and persistent in the pursuit of these goals. Looking ahead thus provides a good indication of what we need to change and motivates us to put in the work.
Forget about comparing yourself with whom you were in the past. Look ahead and compare yourself to whom you want to become! This is what really matters. 🙂
Hope I could a spark some thoughts in your mind 🙂
Goodnight,
That is a new way of looking at comparison. Yes it is always good to look at what we want in future than to look at what we were in the past. But I think the teachers always ask us to compare ourselves with who we were yesterday because comparison comes naturally to us. So instead of comparing with others and getting jealous, better do it with our own selves.
I think we should never compare…
Neither to the past nor in present, nor to the person who we want to become like…..
Comparison always inverse to the self development….
(In my opinion 🙂)
Thank you for sharing this….
Interesting viewpoint 🙂
☺☺
“Forget about comparing yourself with whom you were in the past. Look ahead and compare yourself to whom you want to become! This is what really matters. ”
Yes, that’s true.
I would add: appraise yourself now for all good deeds today.
I guess it’s something with Black Queen Paradox so lets bygones be bygones 🙂
* Red
Very true indeed. There’s a fantastic scripture by the Apostle Paul: This one thing I do, forgetting what is behind and pressing forward.
Great quote! 🙂
That’s an interesting idea.
Thank you for that perspective. I should have gotten that from a guided meditation I did where my future self gave advice to my present self.
I agree with both looking at the past and looking towards the future. I look back at the person I was before so I will always be reminded of the person I no longer want to be. I look forward to my future self so I have a clear perspective of the person I want to be. 🙂 But thanks for explaining this idea in a positive way. 🙂
Good food for thought.
This is the first thing I’ve read today and hopefully has set the tone for my day.
As I read this, I kept thinking about how, in capitalism, the paradigm is that companies are expected to grow and improve, year on year, without fail and I wondered if some of that capitalist thinking has crept in to the expectations we have of ourselves.
As our Society and our Earth are among the most obvious casualties of the ridiculous notion of infinite financial growth, perhaps it makes sense that infinite growth of the individual is equally futile. Maybe we have a natural ceiling to our wants and needs as we get older that has been trained out of us to fit the capitalist agenda. After all, if we naturally reach a certain state of contentment in our lives and want for little, we cease being good little consumers, don’t we?
I would argue that the constant expectation of incremental gains in our lot, compared to yesterday, is neither necessary or realistic and puts us as individuals under an unbearable pressure. We are all aware of the mental, emotional and physical health needs that plague our (western) society today. This malaise is palpable and widespread and is seemingly getting worse. Perhaps we should realise when we are content and when we have enough stuff in our lives. Perhaps we should allow ourselves to emotionally ease back on pursuing the notion of ‘more’ especially as it applies to our individual existence. Perhaps we should just stop – stop comparing ourselves to yesterday, stop comparing ourselves to others and even stop comparing ourselves to a desired future and just live in the moment. Here and now is all that truly exists for any of us.
Thanks for sharing this topic and sorry about the rant.
This is a very useful thought.
Although one should not underestimate oneself there is no harm in making yourself go the extra mile to become a better version of yourself.
I just nominated you for the Leinster Award.
I look forward to reading your answers to the questions and some thoughts about yourself.
Hey thank you for reading 🙂
I’m a guest blogger on here perhaps you’d wanna nominate me in my own site 🙂
Setting goals as opposed to “resting on your laurels” seems like the cleanest way to make progress towards something. What I accomplished yesterday is done, I need to move on.
Brilliant! I love this!
Great motivation! Thank you!
Welcome 🙂
This is a really good way to look at things. I’ve made SO much progress over the last year and a half with EMDR therapy, and any time I have a setback, I feel like that means nothing I’ve learned or accomplished counts. Not true! We have to keep moving forward! Thanks for writing!
Scientificall, comparison is one way of inventing something that would work eventually. Without thinking the process how one can improve is life’s pitfall.
Wow, great topic and nice words.
Comparison makes people sharp as well as Different. Kind of like as seen in different view.
Here have a look at my post on the same topic
https://sfl244.wordpress.com/2018/10/16/which-is-the-best-thought-of-the-day/
Thnx anyway
Beautifully expressed!