Greeks’ Love

Greeks' Love
Drawing by Adrian Serghie

   When we talk about love, we talk about the physical or the spiritual aspects, or even about both. As the big thinkers they were, Greeks knew there are different types of love so they invented different words to describe each of it.

   When we talk about physical attraction, we talk about Eros. This type of love is strictly related to our bodies. We are attracted by another’s body and all we’d want is to have sex with that person. That’s pretty much it. Whilst Eros is the love of the body, (Phileo mistake spotted and corrected by kallona) Philia is the love of the soul. This is the type of love we have for our friends. It’s the emotional connection between us. It’s the type of love that allows us to care one for another.

   I thought that these two are enough, but Greeks said no. We have a third type of love called Agape. This is the unconditional love. It is that type of love that allows us to put someone else above us and to sacrifice everything for that person. It’s the love a parent carries for the child. And yes, there is more. We have a forth type of love called Storge. This is the love we carry for our families and for our community. It’s the empathy-based love.

   Even though we know that all these different types of love exist, we use only one word to express them all, and that word is Love (you didn’t expect this, did you?). I see that there is some sort of a battle between these types of love and the one that wins is Agape. Since it’s the unconditioned love, we it’s the most powerful one. Nothing can break it, whilst the others can be broken.

   All these types of love are required to a most complete loving experience, so none should be ignored. Even though Agape is the most wanted one, all of them combine to create love. Sure, there are people for which we feel only one of these four types and that’s normal since we have different types of relationships around us.

   Based on these four types of love, do you know which one you feel for whom? How differently do we behave with people we love differently?

31 thoughts on “Greeks’ Love

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  1. I know exactly what I feel and for whom. Often people mistake an expression of love for infidelity and such. It is not so. But language and fucking just… religion and “morals” say one is only allowed to love one other person. And that is god. To put any being higher than “him” is sin. The first fucking commandment. Thus the fall of man because he fell for a woman.

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      1. Yet, it’s what most people mostly experience firsthand. The most beautiful person tends to attract more attention. Sometimes they are willing to ignore how illogical or absurd his or her perspective, as long as he or she is good looking. At least, from what I’ve seen recently

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  2. Guys! Eros is erotic! They orgasm and go. There’s nothing sustained about it. It’s lust. Who cares. “Oooh. I like that! I love it! I want it!” It’s just trendy and indulgent and fleeting. Love transforms and grows and evolves. It begins with eros! And if it out lasts the “honeymoon stage” then onwards and upwards to phileo, then agape, and then finally storge! They say god is agape. Well fuck god, because god only loves some people, those who “reciprocate”. What about kindness to strangers? Trying to not actively piss people off? And if you accidentally do, apologise try to make amends but love yourself enough to not settle for less? That their bullshit is their own pain.. you triggered something in them that they had to get all defensive about?

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  3. If one has to categorize love, then one does not know love… 🙂

    “Love is the expansion of two natures in such fashion that each include the other, each is enriched by the other.” Felix Adler

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    1. Or maybe they just try to find ways to express it. It’s not easy to put feelings into words, but people still need to share what they feel. Maybe can only share it through words.

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      1. Perhaps… 🙂

        “You can talk with someone for years, everyday, and still, it won’t mean as much as what you can have when you sit in front of someone, not saying a word, yet you feel that person with your heart, you feel like you have known the person for forever “ C. JoyBell C.

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  4. This is very interesting. I had no idea the Greeks had more than one word for love let alone different kinds.

    I would say I’m weak in the Eros section, Phileo/Storge for family and friends (depends on the person), and Agape for I’m not sure. I don’t think I have grown to experience it yet.

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  5. Agape is the cornerstone. Hard to reach because of people. Just people. Mindsets, how people think of one another in terms of race, religion, creed, etc. Jesus was the only who could practice true agape and those who follow are trying to get there, it’s was a struggle even for Him. But I know who I love and how I love them(My family, of course) All of the above for them!

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  6. As human beings, it’s easy for us to let our disdain for negative attitudes usurp storge. But if (and it has happened) a known bigot of the hugest kind, racist, mysognist, xenophobe was in a car accident and you were the only person who could save them, would you? Would you put all the disdain you have for them to the side to save the life of this human being that is in peril? That’s storge in Greek, but in Christianity that’s called Grace.

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