Been married for 14 years now and my words are just normal as anything else for my family members. We all are chilled and relaxed with each other’s mannerisms and behavior now. 😃🙂
Uuuugggghhhhhh. I don’t know. Because with the people I love the most, they get the unadulterated version of me. I’m supposed to be able to express myself freely with them, rather than mince my words to placate their feelings. I would like to assume they know me better than that. But! We are all human and subject to emotions and the whim of the momentary tone of the words.
Well. It is more my tone perhaps? I dunno. When I speak, not write, I am quite “flighty” and revert to sound effects, onomatopoeia, gestures, and whatever. Lol I am living a pantomime. Haha.
So it is my energy that people respond to
If I am excited I literally bounce up and down and clap my hands and squeal “yay!”.
Whatever emotion I experience, if I communicate it at all, people feel I am directing that energy towards them and they reciprocate or retaliate I kind. And I am like “uuhh I’m sorry! I’m just emoting! Why can’t I just express myself? It’s not about you!” (Thats when I’m feeling upset. I’m trying to tell them I’m just pissed, not pissed at them! Or even if I am, it’s only temporary! I’ll get over it. They should get over it too)
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It depends on the words and who they’re being said to….what kind of words are they “tough love” where you say something to motivate a person to do more or are the words condescending to bring them down and make them feel stupid because of your insecurities?
From my understanding, you try to balance what you get with what you give when it comes to words. Actually, maybe it’s about the feelings those words trigger, not the words themselves.
Should I always choose to speak in a helpful way? Yep. Do I? Nope. It seems those we love most get the worst of our words, especially in anger. I’ve had to apologize for some pretty brutal honesty-as my husband has as well. However, overall we should all be working on the Golden Rule.
It always matters what we say. I def think it’s important to “tame the tongue”…words can either build up or break down someone. Even when we are angry or frustrated, we should express our emotions and thoughts in a way that we won’t regret how it comes out…but the right words and tone can be meant for good.
I definitely agree. I week ago, I found myself in an awkward situation where I was accused of something falsely. Anyway to protect my friends privacy I remained quiet with the person accusing me…instead I vented to a guy friend who didn’t respond the way I hoped…. we never swear or say unkind words to each other but I was “possessed” by nagging.. I guess in this situation it matters how we respond .. ?
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It does… maybe the words used when venting were not the proper ones for that guy to understand your point of view…
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I’m trying really hard to put what I want to express in a positive context by avoiding words with n’t at the end of them.
It’s really hard. I try to use STOP (Stop, Take a step back, Observe, Proceed).
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You will have to ask those that I have spoken/written to… 🙂
“The life I touch for good or ill will touch another life, and that in turn another, until who knows where the trembling stops or in what far place my touch will be felt.” Frederick Buechner
Been married for 14 years now and my words are just normal as anything else for my family members. We all are chilled and relaxed with each other’s mannerisms and behavior now. 😃🙂
That sounds like an awesome environment! I’m really happy you managed to create it! Congratulations! 😀
Ignorance is bliss😃😃
Uuuugggghhhhhh. I don’t know. Because with the people I love the most, they get the unadulterated version of me. I’m supposed to be able to express myself freely with them, rather than mince my words to placate their feelings. I would like to assume they know me better than that. But! We are all human and subject to emotions and the whim of the momentary tone of the words.
So what emotions do your words trigger most of the time?
Well. It is more my tone perhaps? I dunno. When I speak, not write, I am quite “flighty” and revert to sound effects, onomatopoeia, gestures, and whatever. Lol I am living a pantomime. Haha.
So it is my energy that people respond to
If I am excited I literally bounce up and down and clap my hands and squeal “yay!”.
Whatever emotion I experience, if I communicate it at all, people feel I am directing that energy towards them and they reciprocate or retaliate I kind. And I am like “uuhh I’m sorry! I’m just emoting! Why can’t I just express myself? It’s not about you!” (Thats when I’m feeling upset. I’m trying to tell them I’m just pissed, not pissed at them! Or even if I am, it’s only temporary! I’ll get over it. They should get over it too)
It depends on the words and who they’re being said to….what kind of words are they “tough love” where you say something to motivate a person to do more or are the words condescending to bring them down and make them feel stupid because of your insecurities?
I give words based on what’s given to me.
From my understanding, you try to balance what you get with what you give when it comes to words. Actually, maybe it’s about the feelings those words trigger, not the words themselves.
Should I always choose to speak in a helpful way? Yep. Do I? Nope. It seems those we love most get the worst of our words, especially in anger. I’ve had to apologize for some pretty brutal honesty-as my husband has as well. However, overall we should all be working on the Golden Rule.
I hope that in the end, there is understanding about where those words come from and why. I believe it is more important than the words themselves.
It always matters what we say. I def think it’s important to “tame the tongue”…words can either build up or break down someone. Even when we are angry or frustrated, we should express our emotions and thoughts in a way that we won’t regret how it comes out…but the right words and tone can be meant for good.
Yeah, but the problem is that when we’re “possessed” by some sort of emotion, we hardly find the “right” words to express ourselves…
I definitely agree. I week ago, I found myself in an awkward situation where I was accused of something falsely. Anyway to protect my friends privacy I remained quiet with the person accusing me…instead I vented to a guy friend who didn’t respond the way I hoped…. we never swear or say unkind words to each other but I was “possessed” by nagging.. I guess in this situation it matters how we respond .. ?
It does… maybe the words used when venting were not the proper ones for that guy to understand your point of view…
I’m trying really hard to put what I want to express in a positive context by avoiding words with n’t at the end of them.
How do you manage to stop yourself from reacting out of the emotion you feel in that moment?
It’s really hard. I try to use STOP (Stop, Take a step back, Observe, Proceed).
You will have to ask those that I have spoken/written to… 🙂
“The life I touch for good or ill will touch another life, and that in turn another, until who knows where the trembling stops or in what far place my touch will be felt.” Frederick Buechner
Sooo you have no insights about the impact you have on other people’s lives?
Nope… 🙂
“When a friend is in trouble, don’t annoy the friend by asking if there is anything you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it.” E. W. Howe