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How To Give Advice Without Being an Asshole

Let’s be honest. We are living in the age of the internet where everyone and their dog consider themselves an expert at something. Whether that is advising your nephew on how to deal with the school bullies or critiquing some dudes starcraft theory on a nerd forum.

And because we all consider ourselves to be sooo goddamn right all the time, I put together some simple points on how to NOT be a complete condesending asshole when it comes to giving advise.

#1 Know what you are talking about 

Most people, myself included, love to join a conversation or even make one up to not feel left out, or to ‘have our say’. I get it. It makes you feel a little more significant doesn’t it?

The problem is that 95% of the things people say about a certain topic is either only half the truth or some superficial crap they heard someone say. Rarely do people really know the facts and figures.

Look, if you’re going to give meaningful advise, make sure you know what you’re talking about. You can always fool people who are just as unknowledgeable as you are on a certain topic. But you will never fool someone who actually knows shit. And trust me, when that happens, you’ll only embarass yourself and lose credibility. As the old saying goes – “He, who knows everything, learns nothing.”

Here are some examples from people you, maybe, shouldn’t take advice from…

  1. Fitness/dieting/exercise advice from a fat slob.
  2. Getting advice on how to fuck from a virgin.
  3. Getting advice on how to become financially successful from someone who isn’t.

#2 Be sure the person actually wants advise 

There is nothing more uncomfortable and alienating about people you meet who randomly give you unwanted advise. We’ve all come across them. So, if someone tells you about their excitement on how they were accepted to graduate school, don’t randomly go off on telling them on how much waste of a money it is and that it will totally not make a difference on your resumé.

All you will do with that is increase peoples perception that you’re a dick.

Give your genuine advice to people who demand your advice. Otherwise, shut up.

#3 People don’t owe you anything

Eventhough you might be giving someone your advice, doesn’t mean that they have to actually do something with it. It also dosen’t mean you have to rage at people when they didn’t take your advice when something goes wrong anyway.

You see, advise is like a gift. It is given unconditionally. Offer people your advise without expecting ANYTHING in return.

Thats it.

Thanks for reading! Hope I could help 🙂

Max

20 thoughts on “How To Give Advice Without Being an Asshole”

  4. I believe it’s about the receiver not the giver ! Why would you care to have an advice from anyone that gives you? People speak bullshit the entire time so why listening if we don’t want to? Sometimes expert people struggle to advise us and help us and we don’t give a shit, we just do what we want…so it’s always about us not the others
    Thank you for this interesting subject

    Reply

  6. A wonderfully worded post! Wouldn’t it be wonderful if more people remembered this? My colleagues seem to be under the delusion that they are experts in every field from medicine through politics to foreign affairs! As you can imagine they are none of these. I may have to slip a copy of your post into their news papers, see what advice springs out from that! 😂

    Keep writing! 🙂 Luna.

    Reply

      1. Hahaha you are right in the best subtle and candid Way totally I agree bloggers are aiming at something we understand sometimes something else are in our own perspective view so I am the most eligible one surely great article but good advice surely is a great way of bucking one up and sometimes when you are down I just confirmed I am what you said great lol

  9. #3 is something we forget often. Spot on. I’ll definitely keep this in mind. Not every one enjoyed unsolicited advice.

    Reply

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