Question of the Day – No. 273 How do you manage other people’s anger oriented towards you? Share this:TwitterFacebookTumblrMoreLinkedInRedditGooglePinterestPocketTelegramWhatsAppSkypeEmailLike this:Like Loading... 54 thoughts on “Question of the Day – No. 273” Add yours I go away. LikeLiked by 2 people Reply And when you can’t? LikeLike Reply In the past, I’ve paid huge prices to do so, and so I’m positive did the karma of those who would not leave the peacefully intended in peace. There’s always a choice. LikeLiked by 1 person Whatever it is, I’m sure it was my fault. ECHO ECHO LikeLiked by 1 person Reply Echo, stop 😉 LikeLiked by 1 person Reply It convinces people to not anger pretty quickly when I just take full responsibility and move on. ECHO ECHO LikeLiked by 1 person But what if you didn’t do anything? LikeLiked by 2 people I don’t care about that. ECHO ECHO LikeLiked by 2 people Are you a fan of Gary Vaynerchuk? He is a big fan of this idea. LikeLike Never heard of them. ECHO ECHO LikeLiked by 1 person It’s a good thing or a bad thing? LikeLike Reply Not always good, but I’m a creature of habit. ECHO ECHO LikeLiked by 1 person I pay them no mind….unless they come for me directly. Most people who are truly angry, who really feel the need to let you know about yourself or what irks them about, will express it. Otherwise, they’re cowards. So, as the saying goes “don’t come for me, unless I send for you” – Kenya Moore Housewives of ATL. Or in other words, don’t start none, won’t be none.😙 LikeLiked by 1 person Reply That’s an interesting approach. Sometimes they do it because that’s how they can feel good about themselves. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply Honestly, it depends on so many factors. Person A became angry with me for something outside my control – I’ve blocked them, after feeling triggered. Person B is pissed of because of something I did that I feel was the correct course of action – I don’t interact with them, but don’t feel threatened. Mostly, I just keep away from people. I’m not here to eat their stress and anger. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply I love this! It’s so true! -> “I’m not here to eat their stress and anger.” LikeLiked by 2 people Reply 1. Why are they angry at me? is it direct or a projection of anger? Is it jealously disguised or just a bad mood? Pick apart the reasons why and see if valid or no. LikeLiked by 2 people Reply What do you do if it isn’t valid⸮ ECHO ECHO LikeLiked by 2 people Reply Then it is an unreasonable reaction on their part and I’m not the real issue. LikeLiked by 1 person Yes, but what do you do? ECHO ECHO LikeLiked by 2 people Ideally I’d remove myself from the situation. LikeLiked by 2 people Makes sense ECHO ECHO LikeLiked by 2 people So you try to understand the reason behind that? In my opinion, that’s a healthy approach. LikeLiked by 2 people Reply Now I do…years ago I would just be reactive. LikeLiked by 1 person Tell them to fuck off and walk away forever. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply How do they react to that? Or you walk away so fast that they don’t have the chance to react while you’re still there? LikeLiked by 1 person Reply Generally speaking when someone is angry with me, it is more than likely for a legitimate reason. So I try my best to let them have their moment, it doesn’t always work that way, but I try to talk through it as comply as possible. We all can be so angry inside and sometimes you just need to let it go. LikeLiked by 2 people Reply I love your approach! I believe people get angry because of their perception about things. This is why the same situation can make someone angry, but not another. LikeLiked by 3 people Reply I give them space to cool down and once they do …talk it out with them once they become more rational. LikeLiked by 2 people Reply Have you encountered times when they don’t take that advice and they still continue to argue? LikeLiked by 2 people Reply Yes and that’s when I walk away from the person. LikeLiked by 1 person Not to well. I usually get defensive and pissed off if I feel its unwarranted. One of my failings I’m working on improving. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply What pisses you off the most (e.g. the language, the anger of the other, the other’s apparent inability to understand your point of view)? LikeLike Reply Just get mute for some time to realise whose mistake it was. LikeLiked by 2 people Reply Is that always helpful? LikeLike Reply I simply let them be. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply So you hold back all your reactions and you let them manifest until the anger is gone? LikeLiked by 1 person Reply Exactly. LikeLiked by 1 person I have learned it is best to allow people time to process. I no longer take responsibility for someone else’s feelings or behavior, unless I know I am at fault. If I am at fault, I make amends. If I do not “believe” I am at fault, I do nothing. Only my EGO would be responding and I need to keep my EGO in check. LikeLiked by 1 person Our EGO is a challenge… LikeLiked by 1 person Absolutely nothing since I don’t care if they are mad at me or not… LikeLiked by 1 person Reply Not even if they yell at you or cuss you or things like that? LikeLike Reply No, emotions are overrated (anger is one) and people are angry in general because they can and want. Most times they are angry for things they cannot control, so reacting with anger towards anything or anybody gives them a false sense of control. LikeLiked by 1 person You tell LikeLiked by 1 person Reply I try to understand where that anger comes from and I try to empathize so they feel understood. That usually does the trick. LikeLike Reply I believe it was one of the Stoics who said something to the effect of, “Oh, he has a problem with me? That’s his problem.” I like this approach. I can ask if I have offended and try to make amends, but I have no control over the other individual. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply True! and we are responsible for our actions, not for other’s interpretations. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply I will ask them why they are angry at me. If I did make a mistake to make them mad, I will admit to it and ask for forgiveness. If I didn’t commit their accusations, I will tell them that I did not do the things they think I did. If they don’t believe me, I leave. I don’t deserve to have a negative person in my life. If they won’t leave me alone, I’ll get the authorities involved. LikeLiked by 2 people Reply How often did it happen to get the authorities involved? LikeLike Reply None for now. LikeLiked by 1 person I try to diffuse the situation by apologizing for making them upset. If they are willing to listen, I try to explain my view and if they don’t want to listen I apologize and drop the subject. LikeLiked by 2 people Reply Have you encountered situations in which this strategy didn’t work? LikeLike Reply Depends. I usually keep quiet, once done, I will walk away. LikeLiked by 2 people Reply How do people react to that? LikeLike Reply Leave a Reply Cancel reply Enter your comment here... Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Email (required) (Address never made public) Name (required) Website You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out / Change ) You are commenting using your Google+ account. ( Log Out / Change ) You are commenting using your Twitter account. ( Log Out / Change ) You are commenting using your Facebook account. ( Log Out / Change ) Cancel Connecting to %s Notify me of new comments via email.