There are people that talk too much, but how relevant are the things they say? We all know that communication isn’t just about the talking, but what if we’re expressing some ideas other people find obvious (like the water being wet)? Is that helpful or harmful?
In theory, I think it’s helpful because it brings some awareness about how similar the two people are. But what if the second person gets offended because he/she has been told something so obvious? What if he/she thinks that only stupid people and children need to be told such things? If our core belief is that someone thinks bad about us, even a heads up can be seen as an offense.
I like to tell obvious things because I’m making sure I’m on the same page with the people I’m communicating. Sometimes this is interpreted in a negative way. Should we stop saying obvious things? I’m not going to stop because assumptions can do more harm. I rather be seen as an idiot that says obvious things than someone who doesn’t say what it needs to be said. This will always be an issue because people are different so there will be some that would want to be told everything whilst others will get offended if everything is told.
Of course, this depends of the topic and also of the goal of that communication process. Something like the water is wet or it’s cold in winter is indeed seen as an offense. But something like you can imagine how I felt in that situation requires some deep diving to fully and truly understand that point of view.
These days, people get offended very easy. Everything can be seen as an offense because people think they know what other people think, which is stupid. But people get stuck in their own heads and they refuse to see other perspectives. Can communication or over-communication solve this problem? Will it do more harm?
What is your view about over-communication?
I have been one for over communication in the past leading to being called captain obvious. I thought I was being helpful but it’s never received that way so I stopped and nobody has had an issue since. So yes I believe Over communication is a bad thing as it removes the ability to figure things out for yourself using common sense. If you require over communication you shouldn’t be in that situation in the first place.
Interesting view. I found myself in several situations where the other person thought I would thing about the same thing, but it turned out to be different and until we manage to realize that, we encountered some frustrations. I guess it comes down to quantity. If the over-communication creates more frustration compared to misunderstandings, we probably need to drop the first one. Thank you for your valuable insights! 😀
As a communication student, yes, I agree with your opinion. Don’t forget that too much of less communication could also be bad. “Too much” of something is always bad (general rule in laifu QwQ)
That’s true. We need balance, as in every aspect of life.
When one over communicates, when they’re high off their own opinions and have to be heard, can come off insensitive, smug. If you don’t know the answer, then you don’t know. Just admit it. Rambling on topics you don’t have true knowledge only makes you look like a (fool even more).
Yes, of course. When I refer to over-communication, I mean talking about what you know.
Oh, you mean being a smarty-pants lol
Not necessarily. The smarty-pants attitude isn’t required. If it’s replaced with humility and desire to hear others opinion too, I believe it has a positive impact 🙂
Over communication is not a problem until you are original and your intention is good.
But if you talk only of yourself without thinking what others are feeling, then it becomes a problem for you and others.
Well, communication is more than expressing yourself. If we truly communicate, we can’t make it only about ourselves.
Honestly, I am a terrible communicator in my personal life. Professionally, I am a rock star! In my profession over communicating is super important. My patients NEED to understand what I am saying. They NEED to know what is going on with them medically. As far as my personal life I like to keep things bottled up and never share my feelings. My husband gets frustrated about it, so when I do over communicate in my personal life it is a great thing. This is a very interesting post. Thank you for sharing. 🙂
Thank you for reading and for sharing your thoughts! In your opinion, what’s the main reason you keep things bottled up and never share your feelings?
I don’t really have a good answer for that. I’ve just been through a lot with previous relationships and in my relationship with my parents. I don’t like sharing my feelings. It makes me feel weak. Sorry, I wish I had a good answer. 🙁
Depending on how it’s received, over communication can be positive or negative. Usually the biggest problems come from saying too much. But sometimes saying too little can cause problems and/or misunderstandings for both parties. I guess it depends on the situation and context that over communication jumps between these two mediums.
Yes, I think you’re right. Over-communication needs to be used according to the situation (e.g. in situations regarding personal safety, over-communication is actually recommended).
The best thing to do would be to establish a level of understanding with a person and communicate accordingly. Over communicating all the time can be exhausting. One of the best feelings that I’ve ever experienced is to come across people who have similar thoughts as mine. It’s so easy to discuss things with them!
Finding someone similar is such a blessing in life.
I believe that people can’t help but to over communicate . Like you said most people are not aware of what another person knows. However it does cause issues . People that are smart like to figure things out for themselves and will take offense and people that are lazy may be okay with it . It all depends on who you are talking to. You do not want to waste your time with communicating more than you have to.
That’s true. It seems that it requires some level of knowing that other person so we can adjust our communication accordingly.
first i have to think about it a bit difficult subject
It is… I’m looking forward to see your thoughts about it! 🙂
My dad and I like to debate about social politics, science, whathaveyou. But historically, it ends up with us both feeling frustrated. Lately, I’ve realized we each made assumptions about the other’s personal experience. When we began to talk about those differences, we understood each other better and the discussions were more enlightening and rewarding.
So, I think, we have to be careful to communicate enough — not making assumptions about what the other person knows or what their experience is. I’d call that “thorough communication.”
“Over-communication” would be overwhelming someone with more information than they can handle in the moment or talking so much you don’t stop to listen to others.
A true communication implies listening to others, not just talking. But I guess the level of information can lead to an overwhelming feeling.
Yes, you’re right. Communication does imply some listening, not just talking. I was thinking of over-communication being like when someone is doing something brand new and complex and you give them all of the instructions, possible pitfalls, etc., all at once — too much information to process all at one time.