This may be your most challenging question yet. I have a lot of kin; when they’re difficult I kiss them goodbye. Seriously, I’m at a point in my life where if they give me a hard time, I let them know that I have zero tolerance for bullshit. On the flip side, I have several sincere and loving relatives.
This is a very tough question.
You have to be honest, sometimes hard, and even then it’s often not enough.
At that point, as unfair as it may be, you’re the one that has to act, and maybe say goodbye.
I avoid them. I’ve learned that it’s the best thing for everyone involved. It doesn’t do anyone any good to show up at a gathering where I know they’ll be only to get angry at them for their behavior. Things could get very ugly very quickly. I don’t see the point of putting myself in that position when I could just simply avoid it instead.
These reply boxes aren’t long enough to cover that one. For my family I’ve tried to remember what my parents would think of my actions and go from there in dealing with siblings. If I feel I’ve made the effort and it isn’t accepted then we just part ways. With inlaws I don’t think I make as much of an effort to fix it, if its getting broke. Usually I just back off those relationships unless I see the other party making an effort. I’m always open to fresh starts. But I also don’t forget the past. It saves getting burned again.
Honestly? I put at least two states between me and them, and one of those states was Texas. Absence not only makes the heart grow fonder; it makes the sanity grow stronger.
I am writing a book on the subject: “Sanity in spite of Humanity: 6 Rules to dealing with in-laws, outlaws, and dumb masses.” When I get it finished, I can let you know. The first two rules are anger is weakness and calm is contagious.
I write them into my novels and kill them off.
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LOL!!! I’ll have to give that a try! Hahaha!! 🤣
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😂😂😂 🖋🔪🔪
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😂 genius, why have I never thought of that?!
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I’m very wise. Now go, young grasshopper…create and decapitate! 😳 maybe I got carried away.
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Wow! That’s a very innovative, cathartic and productive way! Congratulations for finding such a solution!
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Thanks!
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Loved this way 😂😂
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Thanks 😂
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This may be your most challenging question yet. I have a lot of kin; when they’re difficult I kiss them goodbye. Seriously, I’m at a point in my life where if they give me a hard time, I let them know that I have zero tolerance for bullshit. On the flip side, I have several sincere and loving relatives.
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Total agreement here. Blood is no excuse for torment. You go, and go with your head up!
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It seems that there are not all that bad. I guess you encountered so much bullshit from them that your tolerance got to zero…
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Reblogging this to my readers at sister site Timeless Wisdoms
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Thank you! 😀
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This is a very tough question.
You have to be honest, sometimes hard, and even then it’s often not enough.
At that point, as unfair as it may be, you’re the one that has to act, and maybe say goodbye.
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The thing is that many people want for the others to change… but they probably never will…
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I can accommodate a difficult child as well as the very old that are my kin but for others, I’ll not live anywhere near them.
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I guess that age can make things difficult… but sometimes people are just assholes.
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Don’t engage more than I have to. I am always the bigger person which I hate but I refuse to stoop to their level.
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No one deserves to be pulled down by some people’s limited beliefs…
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After years of trying to change them I work on changing myself and pray for radical acceptance with boundaries
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I’m glad you switched your focus from something you cannot change (their thinking) to yourself. I guess there is no other way…
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I avoid them. I’ve learned that it’s the best thing for everyone involved. It doesn’t do anyone any good to show up at a gathering where I know they’ll be only to get angry at them for their behavior. Things could get very ugly very quickly. I don’t see the point of putting myself in that position when I could just simply avoid it instead.
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That’s exactly true!
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Don’t deal with them at all 🤷🏽♀️
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Sometimes it’s unavoidable…
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In that case just tell them they’re being difficult
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These reply boxes aren’t long enough to cover that one. For my family I’ve tried to remember what my parents would think of my actions and go from there in dealing with siblings. If I feel I’ve made the effort and it isn’t accepted then we just part ways. With inlaws I don’t think I make as much of an effort to fix it, if its getting broke. Usually I just back off those relationships unless I see the other party making an effort. I’m always open to fresh starts. But I also don’t forget the past. It saves getting burned again.
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A healthy approach, I think. What I find very interesting is that they don’t even realize sometimes that they crossed the line…
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Honestly? I put at least two states between me and them, and one of those states was Texas. Absence not only makes the heart grow fonder; it makes the sanity grow stronger.
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Avoidance is not pretty, but it does the job 🙂
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I don’t. It’s not worth the strain on my happiness.
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At what point did you get to this conclusion?
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When I started caring more for myself and my own beliefs than seeking approval from others. It took a long time to get here, but I like myself now.
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Avoid them. If not possible, I put a buffer between myself and that person so there are minimal touchpoints.
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How do they respond to that?
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I do not know, not that I care :-). They are busy talking to the hand (oops buffer)
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I don’t care what they say.. not bothering much lol.. i know it’s useless.
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Well, we cannot change others if they don’t want to change…
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Exactly the point 🙂
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I am writing a book on the subject: “Sanity in spite of Humanity: 6 Rules to dealing with in-laws, outlaws, and dumb masses.” When I get it finished, I can let you know. The first two rules are anger is weakness and calm is contagious.
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Please do! It sounds like a very interesting read!
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I don’t.
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What if you have to?
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