I didn’t know. at school I had to skip a year cause they dont do my year, and they all think im immature and younger than them. I was a bit quiet and suddenly whenever I come to talk they want me gone and they’re always talking behind my back, there’s no alternative school, so I have to sit on my own at lunch/break etc. and I wish I could think of a way for them to like me
I am easily hurt by words so I have learned to easily forget them. I try to acknowledge what needs to change and try to…. be better. For no matter what conversations I’ve had with others, I hurt myself with words far more and far worse than anyone else has/does/could.
The one with my parents after my overdose when I was younger. To see the fear and disappointment in me and the shame I felt for putting them through it all.
My shame truly didn’t hit me until I became a parent myself. Then I realised what I had put them through. The conversation with my parents made me stronger, I believed in myself, I had standards and expectations that I didn’t have before. It’s what made me strong enough to leave two bad relationships, and I didn’t think twice. I knew rock bottom, I survived it. My parents told me I was worth more. I had a mouth that I could talk with, I had arms to hug and I had hands to hold. I had feet to walk away from unhealthy situations. On one hand I grew up. I learnt to trust my gut, value my worth and fight. I’ve been fighting life since, it only begs to question what happens when I feel like I can’t fight anymore? I guess that’s why I always offer a shoulder to anyone who needs it. They need to know too that they aren’t alone and are worthy of themselves
My Marks My Rank My Job and especially My Dreams
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With whom you had these conversations?
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People disowning their parents when they’re old and disrespecting everyone, young or old.
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Those are rude people… full with frustrations.
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The conversation that involves something new that was presented 4 months ago – passed over overlooked – re-packaged as someone else’s idea
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That’s f*cked up… and how was “the new idea” received?
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Getting closure
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Hurtful at first, but maybe helpful afterwards?
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I don’t know about afterwards. But it hurts rn
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Where I was being insulted and I couldn’t defend myself because I didn’t have anything to reply
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Why did someone insulted you?
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I didn’t know. at school I had to skip a year cause they dont do my year, and they all think im immature and younger than them. I was a bit quiet and suddenly whenever I come to talk they want me gone and they’re always talking behind my back, there’s no alternative school, so I have to sit on my own at lunch/break etc. and I wish I could think of a way for them to like me
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I am easily hurt by words so I have learned to easily forget them. I try to acknowledge what needs to change and try to…. be better. For no matter what conversations I’ve had with others, I hurt myself with words far more and far worse than anyone else has/does/could.
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What are the reasons behind hurting yourself with words?
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With a doctor telling me my Mother wasn’t going to recover from her stroke.
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F*ck… that’s really tough… how long ago was that?
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8 years now, but its one of those engrained memories. Just like finding my father passing when I was 9 years old.
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When somebody I loved refused to listen to my attempt to share some very sensitive, intimate and confidential information with him.
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Do you have any idea why that person refused to listen?
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He said it would be to tough for him
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The one with my parents after my overdose when I was younger. To see the fear and disappointment in me and the shame I felt for putting them through it all.
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How important was that conversation for your future (now past) decisions and behavior?
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My shame truly didn’t hit me until I became a parent myself. Then I realised what I had put them through. The conversation with my parents made me stronger, I believed in myself, I had standards and expectations that I didn’t have before. It’s what made me strong enough to leave two bad relationships, and I didn’t think twice. I knew rock bottom, I survived it. My parents told me I was worth more. I had a mouth that I could talk with, I had arms to hug and I had hands to hold. I had feet to walk away from unhealthy situations. On one hand I grew up. I learnt to trust my gut, value my worth and fight. I’ve been fighting life since, it only begs to question what happens when I feel like I can’t fight anymore? I guess that’s why I always offer a shoulder to anyone who needs it. They need to know too that they aren’t alone and are worthy of themselves
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Oh my, they are so many… Words have a powerful impact on me.
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Which one was the latest?
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Conversation of my family informing me my brother had been murdered.
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I can’t even imagine how tough that must have been. I’m very sorry for your loss…
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There’s been lots, but I’d say the ones with a suicidal ex who had amnesia. I had to dredge up those memories….very awful.
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That sounds very tough… how long ago was that?
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Two years ago
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