I’m one who experiences one and it’s opposite, simultaneously, in life. While often I’ll feel ” I don’t give a fuck” what they think, I actually very much will…at the same time. There’s a point in time when I door slam and the individual will no longer have any place in my life.
Before I started my journey in sobriety, other peoples frustrations would affect me terribly. I’ve been in the administrative field for the last 20 years and unknowingly that qualifies you as office therapist. Ultimately, I would end up upset and frustrated myself in trying to help them.
Now? I might listen, but if it doesn’t affect me directly, once they leave, I let it go. Today the only side of the street I have to keep clean is mine.
I think mainly making the honest realization that I can’t fix anyone else except myself.
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I get tense when people are venting their frustrations. If someone is continually frustrated as a person and negative all the time… I get to where I am yelling in my head ” I can’t take this anymore.” I have worked really hard to go from being a person who dumped all her problems on everyone who would listen…to someone that deals and moves on and tries to keep focused on SOMETHING good.
Being around frustrated people tends to trigger me into frustration.
You had a great evolution if you managed to deal with your frustrations and not dump them on others. The thing is that people don’t want to take responsibility for their own life because it’s hard. Venting frustrations is easier…
I ask if I can do something to help. If I can, I do. If someone is frustrated and don’t want advice or decide not to follow what I recommend what I know works. I just move on.
hmmm I think you got me there 🙂 Something to think about. But You missed that I first said… “I will ask if I can help and if I can, I will” so that will be their way, If it is the right thing to do as they want it, but they are unable too, and that is the cause of the frustration.I will do as they want to and fix it. Other wise seek together for a solution. Maybe I should qualify my answers to these questions of yours more. But then sometimes the dementia throws me of the tracks. Such is life. Lol on bad days, I don’t even understand your questions lmao
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I haven’t missed what you said first 😛 If there are times when you don’t understand my questions, feel free to ask for clarifications. I don’t mind! The whole purpose for these questions is to help people.
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Thank you very much. It is very kind of you. With the dementia some days are a bit difficult with the understanding lol
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This depends on if you’re connected with that person – when people you care about are frustrated, it’s natural to empathise with them. I think the level it impacts your day depends on if it’s serious or not – if it’s an everyday frustration, best to chat, move on and not let it impact your day any further!
I’m wondering what would happen if we’re surrounded of the same frustrations every day. Do we manage to stay strong and not get influenced by them or we slowly get “infected”?
Good question! In my opinion I think that would depend on the individual and their level of resilience. I’d expect repeated exposure to someone’s frustrations is likely to have a negative influence on you; so if you couldn’t help them address the issue (for whatever reason) you’d need to draw a line and step away to look after your own well-being at some point.
Whenever I’m hanging around someone who is really stressed out, it immediately makes me stressed out too. I have to get away from them for a while so I don’t start getting irritable.
If you are expected to fulfill your parents dreams and satisfy their needs, you won`t experience unconditional love.
Unfortunately this is very true! It’s strange how love is conditioned by those things…
The feeling like a warm breeze on a cold winter night.
I’m one who experiences one and it’s opposite, simultaneously, in life. While often I’ll feel ” I don’t give a fuck” what they think, I actually very much will…at the same time. There’s a point in time when I door slam and the individual will no longer have any place in my life.
I like to think that they don’t…
How sure are you?
20% 😅😅😅
Before I started my journey in sobriety, other peoples frustrations would affect me terribly. I’ve been in the administrative field for the last 20 years and unknowingly that qualifies you as office therapist. Ultimately, I would end up upset and frustrated myself in trying to help them.
Now? I might listen, but if it doesn’t affect me directly, once they leave, I let it go. Today the only side of the street I have to keep clean is mine.
This is great! What determined this change?
I think mainly making the honest realization that I can’t fix anyone else except myself.
I get tense when people are venting their frustrations. If someone is continually frustrated as a person and negative all the time… I get to where I am yelling in my head ” I can’t take this anymore.” I have worked really hard to go from being a person who dumped all her problems on everyone who would listen…to someone that deals and moves on and tries to keep focused on SOMETHING good.
Being around frustrated people tends to trigger me into frustration.
You had a great evolution if you managed to deal with your frustrations and not dump them on others. The thing is that people don’t want to take responsibility for their own life because it’s hard. Venting frustrations is easier…
so true
I ask if I can do something to help. If I can, I do. If someone is frustrated and don’t want advice or decide not to follow what I recommend what I know works. I just move on.
So either way, you try to do it your way, right?
hmmm I think you got me there 🙂 Something to think about. But You missed that I first said… “I will ask if I can help and if I can, I will” so that will be their way, If it is the right thing to do as they want it, but they are unable too, and that is the cause of the frustration.I will do as they want to and fix it. Other wise seek together for a solution. Maybe I should qualify my answers to these questions of yours more. But then sometimes the dementia throws me of the tracks. Such is life. Lol on bad days, I don’t even understand your questions lmao
I haven’t missed what you said first 😛 If there are times when you don’t understand my questions, feel free to ask for clarifications. I don’t mind! The whole purpose for these questions is to help people.
Thank you very much. It is very kind of you. With the dementia some days are a bit difficult with the understanding lol
This depends on if you’re connected with that person – when people you care about are frustrated, it’s natural to empathise with them. I think the level it impacts your day depends on if it’s serious or not – if it’s an everyday frustration, best to chat, move on and not let it impact your day any further!
I’m wondering what would happen if we’re surrounded of the same frustrations every day. Do we manage to stay strong and not get influenced by them or we slowly get “infected”?
Good question! In my opinion I think that would depend on the individual and their level of resilience. I’d expect repeated exposure to someone’s frustrations is likely to have a negative influence on you; so if you couldn’t help them address the issue (for whatever reason) you’d need to draw a line and step away to look after your own well-being at some point.
It impacts how I interact with others
It also impacts the way you interact with yourself?
Not so much I don’t think
Whenever I’m hanging around someone who is really stressed out, it immediately makes me stressed out too. I have to get away from them for a while so I don’t start getting irritable.
I can relate to that so much. The thing is that sometimes it’s not possible to get away… it’s a struggle.
There are two ways to handle ourselves among those who are frustrated:
1- Act the way, you would want them to act
2- Act the same way they’re acting
But only one of those ways lead to solution(s)
True! And the other one leads to more frustration.