Pointless Overthinking

Happiness Every Day

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Hi everyone,

One of our higher goals in life as human beings is to find happiness, however we define it. We are always in search of it. We make decisions to achieve happiness. We choose a job over the other because it is more likely to bring us happiness. Maybe it will provide more money and that will make us feel happy. Maybe it will allow us to express ourselves and this will make us happy. None of us choose something that will make us unhappy on purpose. Happiness is always a better goal.

What if I already have happiness? Maybe I do not need to look into the future to find it.

When I asked this question to myself, I found that I already have the resources for happiness. So, I should have happiness. What are the resources? Small, ordinary things in life. I have nice friends around me. I like the place I live at. I write. I speak. All these bring happiness to me. So, I asked myself: Why am I still looking for happiness if I already have it?

My answer was: I have them but I don’t see them as sources of happiness anymore because they are very ordinary. They are every day. They are for most people. They are not special to me. That means one thing: When I get the job I so wanted, I will feel the happiness at first. But then it will become ordinary for me and I will no longer notice its potential as a happiness source.

And the cycle will continue forever.

So, let’s do a favor for ourselves today. Let’s remember the ordinary things that give us happiness. Let me know what ordinary things give you happiness in your life. Do you try to remind yourself of those regularly? If not, do you want to?

Betul

86 thoughts on “Happiness Every Day”

  2. “I have them but I don’t see them as sources of happiness anymore because they are very ordinary.” This is a great point. I try to remind myself to appreciate the small things, the day to day things, but I forget that at times. I don’t let them make me happy because they aren’t big and grandiose and impressive. I have a daily gratitude app and I struggle to find things to be thankful for, mostly because I neglect to appreciate the basic blessings I have. Thank you for the timely reminder.

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  3. Hi Betul

    What you are mentioning is that : happines is by-product which can only be achieved through overcoming our challenges. And I agree with you.

    At the beginning whenever we are try to do something and we lack something, we strife to find whatever we need to achieve our goals. However, once our initial goal is achieved and our need satisfied, a new one emerges and the same process resumes again.

    Second point, if we limit our desires and unrealistic ambitions, we are more likely to be happy while chasing those within our control.

    Confuscious once said: If you want happiness, you can achieve it by doing three things:

    First step, remove the “I” because it is Ego. Secondly remove the word “Want” because it is a desire. Further to this point, if you lessen your desires you are leas likely to suffer frustration which the route cause of our unhappiness. Thirdly, after removing the “I” and ” Want” from the statement- “I want happiness” , you are left with “Happiness”. What else do we want?

    I am happy to have shared with you my comments and I hope they could be of help to some.

    Best regards

    Abdifatah Dhuhulow

    Reply

    1. This is a very nice share! Thank you a lot! I agree to ll you wrote. Happiness is a result of knowing yourself: what your desires are; what your goals are and what your abilities are. It is the fine tuning of all.

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  4. One thing that helps me is my weekly gratitude list. I sit down once a week and write down some simple things I’m grateful for. For instance, the warm blanket I sleep with every night.

    I just did a fundraiser for children and adults that don’t have blankets. Through out the process it really put my first world problems into perspective and made me appreciate the small things again, even the cup that holds water to drink from. I feel like we need to constantly remind ourselves of what we already have, and how many don’t have it already.

    Great read and thank you for the insight,
    Have a great day!
    Will

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    1. That is a great point! The gratitude list did not work for me but it works when I see things, as you mentioned in the second paragraph. Thanks for sharing!

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  6. I agree, happiness changes everyday. I think we are a culture of seeking happiness, but forget to realize that happiness is not a concrete definition. It is a feeling, and a feeling that it unique to each individual. What makes one happy, does not another. And that’s the most beautiful part of the journey. The world would be very bland if everyone had the same motives and definitions behind happiness.

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  8. Very thought provoking post. Being truly grateful for what you have, even the ordinary, turns what you have into enough. Gratefulness = happiness.

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  9. I love this post, Betul! Well said. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

    When my mind is busy or dwelling on negativity, I try to focus on the simple pleasures around me:

    -My Sweet Cats
    -Paul McCartney Albums
    -An Autumn Breeze

    These moments of happiness are there for us; we just have to remember to look. 🕊

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  10. A lot of things in my life produce happiness for me, one of those ordinary things would be my pc. When I first got it I adored every single second of use, now I still do but I tend to have to remind myself of it’s luxurious-ness, for it has become just another “ordinary” object in my life. Although I found that when I do remind myself it completely starts the cycle of appreciation all over and I love it. Great read as always btw Betul

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  12. Yes gratitude is essential. But ask yourself this. Is life about finding happiness? Because that would be selfish would it not? Not saying you said “happiness is the meaning of life” but others say it so it gives me pause. Isn’t it the Buddhist who’s tenant is “all of life is suffering”? Perhaps the pursuit of happiness ultimately leaves us disappointed because, as you point out, happiness fades….I believe a pursuit of helping others or a pursuit of connections is more meaningful. That’s just me ❤️

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      1. I’m not an expert on religion but I am a Christian (plus I took World Religions 101 in college) 😀. I know that in Christianity and in some eastern religions, there’s no guarantee of happiness, even if you are very “good”. Just look at what happened to Jesus, the only perfect human being to ever live. He was crucified and died a painful slow death! So from one religious perspective, you can do everything right and still have horrible things happen to you. It’s more likely that you WON’T be happy! And the pursuit of happiness, while our US forefathers made sure that we had the right to pursue, is fine just as long as it’s not the focus of your life. Human nature will tell you to do what feels good. But sometimes you’re supposed to do what feels bad, so long as it’s the right thing to do. I struggle with this all the time!

      2. I know what you mean! I am a Muslim and it is the same logic in Islam as well. Suffering is seen as a necessary part of life. In fact, it is what makes us human. And I also feel some kind of satisfaction from troubles at times. They give more pleasure than overt happiness. There is indeed something in that. Maybe, suffering keeps us grounded.

      3. Yes and what you just wrote reminds me of the yin and yang principle which is from Chinese religion/philosophy. You can’t have good without the bad ☀️👍🏻🙏

  14. I think there’s this tendency to associate happiness with big things–big accomplishments and big moments. We also want to believe that happiness is something that hangs around for a time. Happiness can last but it often comes and goes and we need to be ready to receive it and appreciate the lovely feeling to comes with it. I think ambition gets in the way of happiness. I also think that we can train ourselves to be happier. Being happy often comes down to deciding to be happy. To be contented with what one has, to not let little annoyances pull us down. To pay attention to and notice the small. I think happiness can be something as simple as the absence of sadness. Thanks, Betul, for writing this. There’s much food for thought here.

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    1. Thanks for the comment! I think we tend to confuse temporary excitement with actual happiness, which for me is more like contentment with what we have. If we can get into this mindset, we will be free and happy.

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      1. I do totally agree that it is likely we confuse happiness with other things. By the way, I once created a writing course on the topic of “happiness.” That was several years ago now, back when I was teaching at Bilkent University. One of the things I found during my research while putting the course together is there is some debate on what happiness is. This makes the whole discussion much more difficult (and interesting).

  15. What will bring us happiness?Many things will bring us happiness. I am almost 82 Years old and I have learned that being conscious of our spiritual need is the number one way to gain happiness. This is what Jesus Says at Matthew 5:3 Every word that Jesus spoke is true. I’m sure you would agree with that.

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  22. I absolutely love sunsets, yellow butterflies (they always feel like good omens) and the changing of the seasons from warmth to cold, and back again. These are things that I take deep delight in! Great post!

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  24. Pingback: Happiness Every Day — Pointless Overthinking – Rexton digital

  25. I pray every day on my way to work. In my prayers, I start with gratitude every time. Some days its as simple as the ability to get out of bed when there is someone else that can not. Other days it is a long list of everyday things such as family, friends, dog, a warm bed, running water, etc. The longer the list the better the day.

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  26. I like this post! It is true that the small or daily things will be overlooked sometimes. But one thing that saddens me is all the baddest things happening in the world. From sickness to mass shootings, it just breaks my heart, and one of my friends died in the shooting in California. Do you think there will ever be a time where this doesn’t happen?

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    1. I really wish that day will come but who knows… For now, all we can do is spread love and happiness to our immediate environment. Maybe, our immediate environment will spread them to theirs and them to theirs and so on…

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      1. Thank you for sharing your thought on the subject. Revelation 21:3,4 says: “God… will wipe out every tear from their eyes and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.” What benefits are mentioned in this scripture?

      3. Thank you for reading!!! But how can we benefit for these blessings? I would love to share with you some scripture and answer the questions according to the Bible. May I get back with in a week or so?

      5. Absolutely!!! I will share mine and you can comment where you like. Would you prefer via email or me to just leave it in the comments?

      1. As I really like your blog and started one myself recently I would love to invite you to have a read! It is called searchingforconfidence.wordoress.com and tackles issues like self-acceptance and tolerance!

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