By Troy Headrick
Those who regularly read my posts have likely noticed that I’ve been silent for several weeks. In fact, it’s been close to a month since I published my last blog.
Well, I’m back now and feeling strong and ready to go. I truly believe that my time away from writing gave me the opportunity to reflect and recharge.
We’re only a few days into a new year. Many people see the beginning of a new year as a kind of metaphor or impetus. That’s why so many people make new year’s resolutions. There’s something about the passing of an old year that makes us feel like we can move beyond old ways of living, feeling, and interacting with others. In a sense, a new year provides us with the opportunity to improve ourselves by being reborn.
I’ve noticed that I’ve had a spring in my step in recent days. That’s because I suspect that 2020 is going be an exciting period. In recent months (before this new year dawned) I had been feeling like something wasn’t right. I’d been feeling stultified, trapped, like I’d gone some ways down a street only to discover that it abruptly came to a dead end.
The older I get the more I understand the power of that all-knowing voice inside me that some might call intuition. When I was a younger man, I spent a lot of time listening to external voices—to what experts, advisers, family members, friends, society, and such would tell me. Many people “knew” how I should live my life and weren’t shy about doling out advice and/or passing judgment. Because I hadn’t yet developed a strong sense of who I was and what my values were, I let others make decisions for me and I simply followed along.
One of those things I truly value is the willingness to be open to the possibility of reinventing myself when it feels l like such a reinvention is needed. I now have this strong sense that I need to die to an old way of living so that I might be reborn in a new form. Otherwise, if I continue down the path I’ve spent the last four or so years on, I think it will be harder to feel good about the person I am and the shape I’ve taken.
One of my greatest fears in recent years is that I will become a kind of human fossil. (All around me, on a daily basis, I see people who are already “dead” even though they still walk around, take in oxygen, and appear, at least from the outside, to be alive.) I dread becoming set in my ways, of becoming rigid, of “dying” before I’m dead. One of the greatest ways to stay flexible, to foster that sense of excitement and wonder about life (that can dissipate as we grow older if we’re not careful), is to move beyond one’s comfort zone or to do something difficult—even take an action some might think of as risky. My wife and will be doing something difficult—perhaps even “dangerous”—this year. I’m not ready to announce what form that difficulty will take, but stay tuned.
Of course, doing something challenging will expand my horizons and provide me with new things to thinking about, perhaps even reactivating some parts of my mind that have more or less fallen sleep. It will help me bring some freshness to the writings I do for Pointless Overthinking.
So, I’ve said enough for now. I’d like to hear your responses to this piece…
Troy Headrick’s personal blog can be found here.
I agree with what you said, people are walking 🚶♀️ 🚶 around like human fossils, dead inside and with no hope for the future. 😢 If we are livin’ and breathin’ then we have a hope and purpose to look forward to. Thanks for your insightful post ❤️
Thanks for the comment. Many of those I was writing about–those who are already dead even though they are alive, at least from a technical standpoint–die because they live a life they know to be inauthentic, the kind of life they never aspired to. There’s nothing more physically, mentally, and emotionally sapping than to live a lie. I don’t want that for myself, nor does my wife want to live like that. Thus, we take chances; we live unconventionally. And it feels marvelous to do so. I’ve been living like that forever.
Amen!
Dead inside was exactly how I felt 2 years ago. I sat at my desk in a bank, day in and day out. I was so overwhelmingly bored that I feared I would petrify before the end of each day. I was not living on purpose, I was simply existing. I decided to quit my job and pursue my lifelong dream in the world of art. I started college because I’ve always desired a degree. I’ve since discovered I don’t need a piece of paper to prove I have knowledge and wisdom (although I do love learning). It’s been hard but I’m happier than I ever have been. And y’all I’m 45. It’s never too late to find your true path.
Thanks so much for sharing your story and congratulations in mustering the courage to do something about the stultification you were feeling during your old way of being in this world. I also am very creative and like to both write and do art. In fact, I used to sell art in the past and am (like you) resurrecting my art career. Do you have some of your work on the internet? If so, why not post a link here so we can have a look.
So sorry I missed your comment. Yes, I just recently launched my website http://www.bethhaneyart.com. I hope you will continue to explore your creative side. Never stop learning new mediums and techniques. You may find something you love more than the last thing you discovered. 🙂
Sounds intriguing and exciting!
Continuously pushing boundaries is a great way to live, and it seems you’ll be doing more of that in the near future.
All the best for 2020 Troy. I look forward to reading about the challenges you take on.
Best,
Cam
And the best to you, CamZhu! I thank you so much for participating in this conversation.
I guess we all need to question ourselves in order to be happier, more hopeful in spite of the difficulties of life, and compassionate with others. A great post! It made me think
Many take comfort in living comfortable lives, lives where all sorts of authorities have told them how to behave and what to believe in. Even as a young child, I was always a contrarian. I always wanted to know why things are the way they are. I’m glad my post made you think and I so appreciate your comment.
Great, great post! Couldn’t agree more with the “dead” people. One of my struggles to getting my own coaching/workshop biz going is looking for at least a hand full of people that might feed off of each other’s passion to move ahead. Difficult to find.
I also do a lot of coaching. Why not tell us more? What sort of coaching do you do? Would you like to leave a link to your website? Please give us more details!
Love this!
Thank you! And I love that you were kind enough to read my post and to comment!
I think there are many of us in the world looking to step back and rearrange our priorities. Find something more than the rutt life tends to bring.
I wish you luck on the new you.
Yes, there are many dreamers and many who are satisfied with their lot no matter how enervating they find it to be. Are you putting together an “escape” plan? It sounds like you might be. Thanks so much for participating.
Yes, I’m in the works of building mine. 2020 holds many positive changes for me, and my family!
Excellent! Come back and tell us more once you are ready to share some details.
I am working on my first novel, Becoming the Weaver. I plan to have the first draft finished by the end of the month. Then the revisions start, and I hope to publish later this year.
Wow! Sounds like a cool project. Are you going to be looking for an agent or submitting directly to publishers that are open to receiving unsolicited manuscripts? Or are you thinking of self-publishing?
I’m going the self publishing route. As much as I would love having an agent, I really want to keep the rights and royalties. I am currently working on building my network, so hopefully by the time I publish, I will have a decent marketing strategy in place.
If you feel dead inside then I feel like you’ve nothing to lose trying new things!
We are meant to be alive, not a cog grinding away until we die
Of course, you’re absolutely right! We only get one chance here, so we better do it the right way! I guess it took me quite a long time to realize that there is more than one way to live. We grow up being taught that we have to be serious, get an education, get a job, get married, have kids, and then be grandparents. In other words, we have to play it safe and not color too far outside the lines. But why? Who made up this rule? Isn’t it just an arbitrary pattern? Thanks so much for you comment.
Welcome back !
Thank you! I’ve missed interacting with you!
Welcome back! It’s amazing what some time out and reflection can do for you. Doing something new and getting out of your comfort zone is such a fantastic thing to do. This year in November I’m going swimming with great white sharks lol I wonder if you’ll be doing something similar…
No sharks for me, thank you very much! Nor would I parachute out of an airplane. Even risk takers are sometimes phobic people. Let us know how your shark thing goes. Have you always been such a daredevil?
I wouldn’t jump out of a plane either 🙂 I don’t mind being in the ocean though and the shark diving here is in a cage so it’s not too bad 🙂
Go for it, Troy!
I’m glad to read that you are feeling better with a fresh skip to your walk.
Hey, how’s it going? Have you been writing much on your blog recently? I need to go check it out. Thanks so much for taking the time to read my piece and for participating in this conversation.
Hi Troy. I was happy that I finally got myself to reconnect with other bloggers yesterday, by reading posts. I have gone through a long period when it just didn’t happen. As for my blogging, it has been little for well over a year. I have posted a couple mental health-related posts or stories this past month, but also some cooking stuff. For me, just posting SOMETHING is good.
Good for you. I’ve found that if I don’t publish for a few weeks, then I lose total momentum and have a hard time restarting. I also think that more frequent short posts are easy to put out and keep one warmed up for writing. At any rate, congratulations for reconnecting via your writing!
yes, a new dawn, a new day..spring in your step…all good. Reinventing oneself is wonderfully exciting. Ive done it more times than Madonna..haha…arms in the air for 2020..i need breath of fresh air this year!
Hi. I see that you’ve done a lot of different things and call yourself a “chameleon” which makes us very similar. I, too, like to change my “colors” a lot. The day-to-day grind can be extraordinarily debilitating, so we need to find ways of escaping such drudgery. We only go around once, so we have to make it count. That’s my motto. Thanks so much for sharing your story! Do you blog? If so, I’d like to check out your writing.
yes, i do…if you click on my profile i think it
will take you there..only been on wordpress for 6 months now ..i enjoy reading about many topics..i have 2 other blogs , this one on here started as a new project of mine back in july:)
but if that doesn’t work, try this link https://theglassvidalia.home.blog
Thanks. I’ll try the link because clicking on your profile didn’t work for me.
Its soo true .. nowadays ppl are only breathing n not living .. they dont hv a sense of purpose.. they are nomore excited for whts coming next.. ukno they are just doing it bcoz they are not dead yet.. idk if it makes sense to u .. wht i just said ..
But your post was quite insightful !!
Also, m glad tht you took sometime for urself !! Its so important.. and ya happy new year 🌸
Your post makes perfect sense! So few people have the courage required to live fearlessly and authentically. Years ago, I promised myself that I would live the uncommon life and I’ve been pretty successful in keeping that promise. Take care and thanks for the comment.
Hi Troy! Welcome back. And, awesome post. Your message is so important.
My husband and I travel a lot, and when we pass old cemeteries we think about how each of those eroded stones represents a person’s entire life. We talk about how, if it’s an old grave, everyone who knew that person is also gone. It’s oddly reassuring, knowing that we have one go around on this planet. So how will we spend it? May we be our best, most authentic selves. 🕊
Thanks so much for sharing your story. I, too, like walking through cemeteries. As a practicing Stoic, this is part of my training–getting comfortable with my old mortality. So many refuse to think about how impermanent all this is. Because of this, they always talk about “tomorrow” and rationalize waiting to make a significant change. I hear so many people talking about how bored they are, about how they feel they are simply existing, putting one foot in front of the other day in and day out. It takes real courage to make the decision to start anew, to do something unconventional. I pride myself on being that sort of person (which is likely the reason many in my family think I’m weird). I know you’ve written about these same subjects yourself. Take care and may you and your (growing) family live a peaceful and fulfilling life.
Well said, Troy. (As usual! 😎) I’d much rather be ‘weird’ and misunderstood than safe and boring. Bring on the adventure. 🕊
This describes the past three years of my life and the next ten years to come, in a nutshell. Well said.
Thanks for your comment. I’m glad that you liked my piece. I very much advocate living the uncommon life!
The part which really resonated with me was how you described over time you have learned to listen to your own intuition instead of “experts” around you. As a young woman just graduating college there are so many “experts” who love to share their advice with me, what job to get, where to work, who to not work for, etc. As I naturally have been, I am always open to hearing them out but also taking it with a grain of salt. Although I feel I have strong sense of direction and values, I know I have a lot of room for improvement this year which am really looking forward to. Another great topic thanks for sharing!
Also, can’t wait to hear your new plans Troy. Best of luck!
Thanks for sharing your story and experience. Most of us have had those “advisers” over the years. Like you said, listen, but ultimately, we all have to find our own paths.
This post was a mirror image of my life. So nice to feel I am not alone. So a raise a glass to filling the blank page of 2020 with new memories and stories.
Thank you so much, Theresa, for sharing your story. We’re not alone. Many of us know (deep down) that there are so many more possibilities for our lives if we simply muster the courage to follow our bliss and intuition.
Very true. Here is to following our truth.
Great post. I think introspection comes with the new decade and personal growth becomes even more relevant as we embark on the new decade. Time is a great reminder to continue to grow. BTW…love your domain name (pointless… 🙂 )
I agree. The start of a new decade makes people more cognizant of the passage of time and encourages some to make the sort of changes that would lead to greater happiness and fulfillment. I can’t take credit for the name of the website. Bogdan, the owner of this blog, came up with it. Thanks so much for your insightful comment.
May your zest for life stays upbeat always! Great post!
Thanks so much. And may you live peacefully and happily forever!
I enjoyed your post this morning. It felt like confirmation. I am 74 this year, alone, reducing my stuff by 50%, and about to sell my house of thirty-eight years and leave a town I’ve enjoyed for forty-four years. I’m about to launch my next adventure, destination unknown. (BTW: thanks for visiting my blog!)
Cool! Because I’ve been such a wanderer and have done several trans-Atlantic moves, I find myself getting rid of stuff every few years. There’s a lot to be said for traveling light. When you get your destination figured out, come back and tell us all about your next adventure. Thanks so much for your comment.
Welcome back
Thanks. I really appreciate the comment. Do you blog? If so, I’d like to check out your writing. By the way, do you life weights? I used to when I was young. In fact, I lifted so often and for such a long period of time that I got pretty strong and was much bulkier than I am today.
I blog but with more pics than writing!
thank you pointlessoverthinking
Your blog is great
thank you pointlessoverthinking
great blog