Hello again and salutations to my fellow wordpress wanderers. I’m writing this not only to share my perspective, but also to ask for your opinion. Strange times call for asking strangers on the internet for advice, right?
I recently returned home after spending 2 weeks in the beautiful country of Croatia. Reminiscing on the trip floods me with emotions. Traveling and living like a nomad brings me so much life. I feel energized, inspired, alive. I am entirely engaged in the present moment. That boundless sense of freedom you feel while riding your 50cc moped across a random sleepy island in the Adriatic sea. Zigzagging our way across Hvar, oblivious to the time or even the day. The only map we followed was the little voice in our heads saying ‘this way, this way.’ Those feelings will stay with me forever. But was it worth waiting the whole year for that trip?
Although I’m an ardent advocate for finding simple pleasures in our every day lives, it’s also important to recognize when your current routine isn’t working anymore. As I’ve been settling back into my routine, I can’t help but recognize the level of complacency. I have no complaints with my life right now; I have everything I need and want, there’s just something missing—risk.
The past 5 years of my life I’ve experienced constant change and growth. Through college I had 11 internships (8 international), played soccer in the NCAA Conference Carolinas for 4 years, studied abroad in 3 countries, and lived in England, Spain, and all over Italy for 18 months. Some people fear change, others thrive in it. Some, like myself, cannot live without it.
To me, change and risk go hand in hand. With change, there’s an innate component of risk that it might not work out. You may regret it and be worse off, but there’s a chance you might be happier than you could’ve ever imagined. That chance I have to fight for freedom and happiness—that’s what pulls me out of bed each morning. That’s what keeps me going. That’s the fire I feel burning under me. That’s what I’m missing.
My plan is to live, work, and study for my master’s degree abroad again within the next 2 years. My problem isn’t that I feel the need to rush it, it’s that I feel like my ‘peak’ happiness isn’t here anymore, it’s in the future. It seems far away.
I have found myself joining the eminent epidemic of hedonic adaptation. Which is defined as, “the observed tendency of humans to quickly return to a relatively stable level of happiness despite major positive or negative events or life changes.” Unfortunately, being aware of this psychological trick our brain plays on us doesn’t make us immune to it.
These questions remain with me: Why can’t I be as happy in my life with less risk? Do I need risk to be happy? Why do I see my happiest self in the future?
Does anyone else feel the need to have a heavy component of risk in their life like me?
As always, thanks for reading, and if you want to read the article I mentioned about simple pleasures read: https://pointlessoverthinking.com/2020/01/10/how-to-love-the-repetition-of-life/
You can find my personal blog here: https://poemsandprose.travel.blog/